john is the shit.
i'm supporting his mayoral bid even though he'll be lucky to get .5% of the vote.

He's the only man I've met who does not lie about being a lying con-man with loose morals. I've not known him to have weak ethics and his heart is made of precious treasures.

My god, how could I have not written a testimonial for this crunchy-on-the-outside-but-oh-so-tender-on-the- inside man!?!
He is a total bitch to work for, a ton of fun to casino hop with, looks hot driving a BMW, and yes- it's true...he is really fun to fuck.

he gave me a pubic hair for xmas

Chicken John is really fun to fuck!

Chicken is my nemesis.

I love this man, and that's that. If you don't love him too, I'm guessing it's because you did something sorta lame or dumb in his presence and he responded by handing you your ass on a platter with a fork and a side of fries, and you didn't like the smirk he gave you when he did it. Understandable, really. Me, I happen to find those tart edges of his rather endearing, and dare I say it, even have found his input helpful from time to time. Besides, he's not always right. He just speaks with authority, is all - although in fact sometimes he's notably full of beans. Either way, I love this man, and that's that.

Chicken John is a big fucking asshole.

Hate him or love him, a lousy day with Chicken John is more fun and intellectually stimulating than a great day with practically any other human or fowl. And I am always right about everything.

No matter what mood I'm in, when Chicken's on the mic I'm happy.

Chicken John is the smartest idiot I know. Or the dumbest genius, same difference.

I've heard he's brilliant, charismatic and intimidatingly ambitious, but they never tell you that Chicken John is a self serious, quasi-dillusional, gossipy fuck -- which he is.
But, jesus CHRIST, he is so hot.

Chicken has an incredible presence which he wields without shame. His soul vibrates with an addictive energy that’s sparkling and insightful, raw and dark. Life is never dull when he’s near. If you’re delicate, just run. He’s been great to me. Quite wonderful in fact. But if you ever assume he’s domesticated, you’ll regret it.

Let me tell ya something - Chicken George and I go way back. Way back before the days of aural exciters and automatic transmission. I was the roadie when he was still playing drums with the PIGFUGGERZ. Man, that one gig in the Borscht Belt... I wasn't all that mad when my check bounced, 'cuz I figured, you know, the man must have his reasons. That Chicken George is a mean quarterback, too, and a switchblade razorback. And another thing, hey, come here, come a little closer... he might know how to make some real heavyweight Bozos sit up and beg, and he'll say I Love You, but he will never, never marry you.

A walking miracle, yes. But I know his secret: HE'S POWERED BY ELECTRIC EELS!!

chicken taught me everything i think i know...there i said it.

Sometimes I think Chick was Glenda the good witch in a previous life. Damn, she must have fucked one of the those midgets or something.

yeah, well...everybodies gotta be somebody i suppose...

Chicken saved my mother's life, once. True story.

Whe you're on Chicken's turf, everything runs on Chicken's rules, whether you like it or not.

Play or don't play.

I play.

I'm glad Chicken John isn't always nice. It would be weird....I like what he does with his feathers and creative vibe.